loneliness

i think it takes a special talent to be able to live by yourself. after only about a week and half two weeks of being in the apartment by myself i already feel like the loneliest person alive. simply because my roommates aren't here to keep me company. i have been picking up shifts at work just so i can have something to do with my time. i think i have also been helping in keeping blockbuster open (i've rented tons of movies). i did get to go home for christmas day (i had to work both christmas eve and the days after christmas) so it was nice to have some human interaction then. but sadly i will continue to be alone until after the new year, the roomies won't be returning until january 6. so my lonely days and nights will continue for some time more. luckily i work a lot next week. and on my two off days i'm going to go up to work and type some packets for the managers. they're lucky i have nothing else to do with my life.

also with my roommates gone i have noticed that i don't really have any friends besides them. my one other really good friend here no longer speaks to me (and even if he tried i don't think me or my tear ducts would last very long...) and i don't hang out with many people from work and school friends (the few that i so actually have) have all gone home for the holidays. Am i the only person that's left here alone in this town? there is bound to be someone else that is bored out of their mind that would be interested in making a new friend. but i suppose that even if there were such a person a) i wouldn't know how to find them b) they wouldn't be interested in being my friend and c) i would be working too much to do anything with them. but wouldn't it be nice to fool myself into thinking i had so many friends and invitations to do things that i was just turning people away... *sigh*

normally i am very content with my handful of really close friends and that's it, but for some reason the loneliness here lately has made me wishing for more. i suppose it is simply selfish wishes to keep me from boredom and not really the want for more friends. i would just be using them anyway.

things i have done so far while i was alone:
-rented/watched:
-superbad
-p.s. i love you
-the fountain
-skin walkers
-speak
-v for vendetta
-gosford park
-the office season 1 and 2 (the uk version)
-elf
-miracle on 34th street (both the 1947 and 1994 version)
- a christmas story ("deck the hars with bars of harry. far ra ra ra ra")
-made the outline for 3 mix cds
-found out about tons of new music
-watched about 30 episodes of ghost hunters (i'm obsessed)
-updated my itunes
-organized my music

seriously i need some company!